Our Journey – Step 1: Prepare Your Body

We didn’t wake up one morning and decide, “Right, let’s get pregnant this week.” Nope — it started months before with a quiet decision that this was something we truly wanted. And then came the research rabbit hole (we’re talking Google PhD levels here).

At that point, we were healthy-ish. But like most people in their thirties juggling work, life, and just surviving, we realised there was prep to do — inside and out.

For me, it started with cleaning up my supplements. I'd been taking your average multivitamin, but I quickly learned not all prenatals are made equal. Kat switched hers after we compared ingredients — she was like, “Wait… this one actually has folate, not just folic acid?” And that little difference? It mattered more than we thought.

Folic acid is the synthetic form of vitamin B9 — it's the one added to processed foods and the cheapest option in most off-the-shelf supplements. But not everyone’s body can convert it efficiently. That conversion step depends on your MTHFR gene (and yes, that name made us laugh too), and about 1 in 3 people have a variant that slows the process down.

Folate, on the other hand, is the natural, bioavailable form of B9 — your body knows what to do with it right away. It helps prevent neural tube defects and supports healthy cell development, which is especially important in early pregnancy — often before you even know you’re pregnant.

So we made the switch, knowing we wanted to give ourselves the best possible starting point.

We also had that awkward realisation: neither of us had been to the GP in a while. So off we went — pap smears, STI screenings, blood work to check vitamin levels, the full works. It felt like overkill at the time, but trust me: when your body’s about to become a baby’s first home, you want it as ready as possible.

We cut back on caffeine (honestly, not easy for me), swapped wine nights for smoothie mornings, and slowly nudged our routines into something a bit more nourishing. It wasn’t perfect. There were still stressy days and takeaways. But we knew we were building towards something big.

And here’s something not talked about enough — emotionally preparing your relationship. At some point, Kat looked at me mid-Netflix and said, “What if it doesn’t happen?” That moment stopped me. It made us talk — not just about baby names and nursery colours, but the mental load, the waiting, and how we’d handle the ups and the downs.

Because the truth is, we were already struggling with fertility issues — even before we tried. Both Kat and I had past reproductive health challenges that raised red flags in early discussions. There was a quiet fear behind all the prep work. Like, what if our bodies couldn't do this? What if we’d never get to meet the baby we already loved in our heads?

But that fear became fuel. Through at-home artificial insemination, we became mothers on our first and second cycles — something that still feels surreal to this day. We shared every step of our journey online as @2bumps_samelove, and what we didn’t expect was the wave of connection that followed. Women from all over the world reached out, saying, “Me too.” That’s when the spark for Hāpū Helpers was born.

So that was Step 1. No needles. No pregnancy tests. Just two women slowly getting ready — physically, emotionally, logistically — for the road ahead.